That's What She Said

Back again.  We went out of town for each of the last 2 weekends.  In between that, the girls' school let out, our internet router stopped working, and a couple of posts that I started ended up going longer than I thought they would (doesn't sound like me, I know, but it's true).  Another landed in the "vault of purgatory": finished, but may or may not get published.

But, like I said, I'm back, and I think I'm on track for the next couple of months as we're flying into summer.  Without further ado...

As I explained here, my younger daughter recently turned down a starring role in "It's All in Your Head" due to shyness and stage fright (rumors of her getting fired from the project due to diva-like demands are completely untrue).

The problem with her turning down this role is that many of the posts here on WPFF have, it so happens, focused on my older daughter.  The role my younger daughter turned down was going to give her her first big blast of coverage on her daddy's blog.  So since then, I've been looking for chances to feature her in a post.  Today is the day for that post.

Through the years, the Hungry Preacher's Kid 2 has demonstrated a distinct perspective on life, vocalized through questions and insights.  I've compiled a few of these in "quote form."  I copied the style from a "quote of the day" calender I once had.  I'm sure I'm forgetting some.  If I remember one or two, I may just add them to this post.  If I think of a bunch, maybe I'll make another post out of them.  All in all, THPK2 makes us smile an awful lot, and I hope these few examples help you to see why.

-THP

ON ORIGINS OF EMOTIONAL CONDITIONS, QUESTIONABLE:

“My sister gave me her grumples.”

-answering, with utmost sincerity, my question, “Why are you acting like this?”

ON DIRECTIONS, IMPORTANCE OF DETAILS IN:

“I think she’s on the breakfast table next to my gorilla.  So if you see gorilla, look next to him, and then you’ll see Uniqua.”

-answering my question, “Do you know where Uniqua is?”

ON PRECISE MEDICAL TERMINOLOGY, USING APPROPRIATELY:

“No.  I just have a headache.”

-answering my question, “Does your head still hurt?”

ON WORD SELECTION, CLOSE ENOUGH:

“God, thank you for these- What are these called again?  Rascals?”

-praying before dinner, trying to remember the word for “shortribs”

ON ORIGINAL SONG VERSIONS, DISPUTED:

DAUGHTER 2:  “Why do some people sing songs of other people?”

ME:  “Sometimes if someone really likes someone else’s song, they’ll sing it because they like it.”

DAUGTHER 2:  “Is it like the girls that sing ‘Single Ladies’ even though it is really by the Chipettes?”

ON DOGS, OVERLOOKED DISADVANTAGES OF BEING ONE:

“Do dogs have to put on a special kind of tattoo if they want one, or do they just not wear them?”

ON EMAIL, WHY IT’S HARDER TO WRITE THAN IT USED TO BE:

with me trying to finish one quick email while DAUGTHER 2 is bouncing off the walls and really, really wanting some attention

ME:  "Sweetie, seriously, just give me like 2 minutes.”

DAUGTHER 2:  “OK.”  [pause]  “What does ‘seriously’ mean?”

ON TIME, LOSING TRACK OF:

This past year, on Mondays and Tuesdays, Mom took DAUGHTER 1 to school on Mondays and Tuesdays, leaving DAUGHTER 2 with me for the day.  Almost always, DAUGHTER 2 was out of bed by the time they left.  One day, DAUGHTER 2 woke up and got out of bed about 20 minutes after they left.  Then, about 3 hours later, she suddenly volunteered to me: “I wonder why my mommy and my sister are sleeping so late.”

ON BENEFITS OF SCHEDULING ERRANDS, INCIDENTAL VS. INTENTIONAL:

with me driving our dog, Poozle, to the vet, and then planning on taking the girls shopping, we had this exchange:

DAUGHTER 1: What are we doing first?
ME: First we're going to drop Poozle off.

DAUGHTER 1: Why?
DAUGHTER 2: Is it because he stinks?

ON SOURCES OF HAPPINESS, UNEXPECTEDLY FOUNDATIONAL:

“I just want little gorilla.  That’s the only thing that will make me happy.”

-while crying, after being punished by losing her stuffed animal for the duration of her quiet time

ON GUN VIOLENCE, POTENTIAL IRONIC INCIDENTS OF:

DAUGHTER 2: (leaving the dentist office with me, pointing to a “NO FIREARMS ALLOWED” sign) “Daddy, what does that sign mean?”

ME:  “It means that they don’t want anyone to bring guns inside the building.”

DAUGHTER 2: “Is that because they don’t want someone to get shot in the teeth?”

ON FRUSTRATING DJ’S, HOW TO:

“I want a song, but I don’t remember the name of it or how it goes.”

-when it was her turn to “pick a song” during a car ride

ON PENGUINS, FAMOUS ASSOCIATIONS OF:

“This is Pablo.  He is best known for being a Backyardigan.”

-practicing her informational speech in the car before introducing her stuffed animal at school for show and tell

ON MULTI-TASKING, STRUGGLES OF:

ME:  “After this game of Wii, I want you to eat your pizza.”
DAUGHTER 2:  “OK.”  [pause]  “Did you say you wanted me to get my boots on?”